Is Begging From Strangers On The Internet Now “In?”

The first time I saw an ad over the internet for a couple asking for money from complete strangers, all over the world, I thought it was a joke. I literally thought it was a spoof but it wasn’t April Fool’s Day so I didn’t understand it. Until I saw another ad asking people for money to pay their expenses to cover their credit card minimum. I’ve seen actual ads for couples asking people to donate for their fertility treatments, for their sick dogs and cats and yes, one for an ailing bird.

Money

My husband was laid off from his job10 months ago. He started looking Day 1 and hasn’t stopped. I am not able to work full-time due to physical limitations (numerous health conditions including Fibromyalgia, Kidney Disease, auto-immune disease, Hashimoto Thyroiditis, Syncope and Hypotension ) but even I am looking for part-time. We are not eligible for unemployment money. It never crossed my mind to put an ad on Facebook or anywhere on the internet to beg for money. Call me old-fashioned. When did this become a socially accepted use of media? Or, a personal standard?

I’m not judging (okay, I’m TRYING not to judge) but this is all so new for old-fashioned me. Is this the younger generation’s idea of problem solving? I sincerely hope not. So, believe me this blog post is NOT about asking for money. I would not do that. But, I am asking for a favor and while I don’t have high hopes I consider this networking because my husband gave me permission to put his résumé on my blog.

He does not want a hand out. We would not accept money to pay our bills. We would rather move (which we are talking about) anywhere he can find a job. Do I want to move? Not really. I have an elderly mother here and my sister, both twenty miles away from me, I’m in the middle. Our children go to SUNY schools.

Half Empty Or Half Full?

Half Empty Or Half Full? (Photo credit: MarkyBon)

I am not asking for pity but a connection would be lovely. The following link is my husband’s resume, please read it and pass it along if you know anybody. Anybody who is somebody is even better!

http://www.proj-mgt.com/dfriedmann.pdf

If you can find it in your heart to take a minute to read his résumé, we would greatly appreciate it. I’m not too proud to network for my family, that’s what families do, we stick together. We are trying to stay positive, truly. Today was rough, maybe tomorrow will be better.

Thank you for reading my blog and for any help you can give us.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

To Huff Po,

English: Arianna Huffington attending the prem...

English: Arianna Huffington attending the premiere of The Union at the 2011 Tribeca Film Festival (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Dear Arianna,

“Ten Things You Do To Make Yourself Look Ten Years Older?” Really?  SO WHAT!!!

On behalf of so many women what on earth were you THINKING when you approved that horrid article about “10 ways to appear younger for women? ” We are still reeling with disappointment and frankly we thought perhaps you might have been on vacation that week. That truly would have been the only excuse (and that’s pushing it) for you to have allowed that article to run.

Here was my initial reaction on Facebook: “Dear Arianna, at Huff Po, this is an offensive article. People should be comfortable in their own skin. I wear mom jeans and sneakers all the time, I have adult children (okay my daughter) that would love for me to be more fashionable, guess what? Too bad. I’m 57 and while I need to get used to forming the word sixty, I am perfectly comfortable being who I am. Wisdom has to be acquired, dear. So, a little advice, whoever said okay to this article should be fired. Or at least, get someone to write a counter point. Like me. I’m happy to do it for you. hibernationnow.wordpress.com”

After doing a little research about Huff Po what I read and I’m merely paraphrasing is that much of the staff is comprised of “twenty-somethings.” Way to go to get a true, objective article on aging. Arianna, please, get a grip and turn the once loved magazine around, before it’s too late.

What about enhancing our beauty and embracing our lives at whatever ages we are? No more mom jeans? Tough, some of us like mom jeans, you could have, however, said “wear a belt, or a colorful scarf to accessorize.”  Comfortable shoes? My sneakers are great for my feet and I don’t need nor do I have the money to buy “comfortable shoes that are stylish.” Sure, I have looked at those they cost $1,000 and  $400.00 not $100 and besides Ms. Huffington, where do you think we are going at night?

Some might have the income you have but most of us don’t.  A night out for me is either cooking dinner or once in a while going out to an inexpensive dinner ( my husband is currently unemployed in the Computer Industry and I have a chronic pain disease) taking off my “mom jeans” and”sneakers” and happily changing into my pajamas or sweat pants (gasp, yes, I did say that) pulling off my unfitted bra and relaxing at home, reading a book or watching some benign television show that makes me happy.

Call me totally mindless and stupid but I get personal pleasure out of watching shows like “Parenthood” or “Gray’s Anatomy” instead of horrifying news or tv shows that display all blood, guts and murder. There’s enough of that in the real world, thank you very much.

Once my greatest dream was to publish an article in The New York Times or The Huffington Post. Now, I don’t really think that would be much of an achievement after all. But, you do owe it to women who are fuming across the country to show them this side of the story about aging.

If you and your loved ones are healthy, be happy to awaken to another day, enjoy your loved ones as they love you. Look at yourself in the mirror, without any make-up or new dress- up changes; if you  see some wrinkles? Smile, you have lovingly earned them. Be happy with yourself, just the way you are.

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Whoever Said “Facebook Friends Aren’t Real” Is One Big, Stupid Idiot.

An American version of a fruitcake which conta...

An American version of a fruitcake which contains both fruit and nuts. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

The holiday season is winding down and I’ve read blogs about fruitcake, go ahead, start the jokes… Pass them around like some people did (not me, kids) like a joint or bottle of beer when they were in college. I’ve heard it all, all the silly jokes how nobody likes fruitcake, and everything is artificial, ad nauseam.  My father, when he was alive, ate fruitcake joyfully and loved it; he passed that gene on to me.

I love fruitcake, I honestly do. For years I begged people if they had received fruitcake as gifts NOT to throw them out because I would happily take it off their snobby shoulders. Funny, in all that time, nobody offered me their unwanted fruitcake. Nobody, until recently, one of my Facebook Friends, Sarita, saw me talking about fruitcake and out of nowhere she offered to send me a mini fruitcake that was baking in her oven.

Sarita, is one of my group of Facebook Friends that share a common and unyielding illness. We all seem to have some sort of chronic pain disease, in my case, Fibromyalgia. Believe me, it is not limited to Fibromyalgia (Fibromyalgia generally doesn’t work alone) but comes with many other ailments. I also have an auto-immune disease, Hashimoto’s Thyroiditis and some of my friends share that as well. Others have different, chronic pain but we are connected, perhaps not in person since we live in different places but definitely in our hearts.

When I told my (adult) children that my friend on Facebook was sending me a mini-fruitcake across the country they looked at me with those critical eyes, and the “what are you crazy” stare? “Mom, they said slowly in single syllables, you. don’t. even. know. her. she. could. be. send.ing. you. An.thrax.” I had never heard a more ridiculous thing in my life. Of course I knew her, I have known her for years, we’re friends, we are here for each other, we support each other.  The fact that Sarita was a “stranger” NEVER ONCE crossed my mind because Sarita was my friend and I was hers.

“So, my observant 19-year-old daughter said,  you wouldn’t mind if I was corresponding with some random man on the internet and he baked me some cookies and sent them to me and I wanted to eat them? Well, now that was indeed different, I said. I have talked to Sarita on the phone several times, we’ve been in touch with each other for years and I am not 19 and Sarita is certainly not some stranger. However, my daughter was right, I would not feel comfortable with her taking candy from strangers but I hardly see it as the same situation.

Facebook Friends for those of us with common limitations are not only useful to us but sometimes life-saving, Who knows better what it feels like to be in a Fibro Flare than another Fibro patient? I don’t like to complain to my family or my friends at home because frankly, they just don’t get it. How could they? They don’t have the illness. I’m not saying they lack empathy (most lack it a few don’t) but my Facebook Friends understand what I feel, completely every single day.

To them, I say THANK YOU, for the love and support and the ongoing kindness. We are all here for each other and that means a lot. I need to take a break now, for some more fruit cake and with it some pumpkin bread as well. What did you say about my Facebook Friends? Yeah, that’s what I thought. It’s okay, we are all wrong sometimes……May God or Spirit or Angels Bless these special people in my Life. They are in my life for a reason.

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The Gazpacho Chronicles

Gazpacho

Gazpacho (Photo credit: Sarmale / O.)

Summer is here and the arrival of summer for me is not the date on the calendar nor is it the
temperature outside. The arrival of true summer, to me, is when gazpacho, the chilled, delicious Spanish soup is available to buy in stores. Many people make it themselves, I am not one of them. I don’t have a food processor nor do I have the patience to chop /blend tiny bits of vegetables. In the town where I live I have started to review gazpacho from a variety of stores in and near Chappaqua, NY.

The first restaurant I went to was Local, a very sweet, small restaurant that has not been open that long but serves salads, sandwiches, soup, ice cream and everything there is simply delicious. Everything there seems natural, your sweetened iced tea made with agave syrup. Their gazpacho that I took out was very smooth with a hint of citrus, I loved it. Adam, the owner made sure to give me bread along with it and treated me to one of his infectious smiles. How did this town exist before Local? To be noted: they use paper products to go which is great for the environment but they always spill over, every single time.

The other place I tried gazpacho is from a fancy store called Susan Lawrence, it’s hard to describe but to say it is a gourmet deli is an understatement. All their things are beautiful, truly beautiful. Their cookies and cakes are stunning to look at, they have salads, entrees, cakes, soups. Their gazpacho had chunks of vegetables in it, tasted delicious, it’s just a matter of taste. I prefer smooth gazpacho, the chunks in Susan Lawrence’s were a little too big for my taste. Take out containers were sturdy plastic.

Big, did I say big? I take it back. Today I went to the new supermarket in Armonk called Deciccios (we are all deathly jealous of the store) and tried their gazpacho.  I practically needed a fork and steak knife it was SO chunky and spicy. I wasn’t a big fan at all, had a tiny bit and called it a night.Did not even finish the small amount in the bowl.  I would not go back for more although I did beg the supermarket manager to open up in OUR town. They said I was the 10th or 11th person to beg them to come.

One last stop, Joe from Le Jardin de Roi offered me a free sample of gazpacho on Facebook. Don’t worry, I’m coming…We went tonight with our son and the adorable Joe seemed kind of excited to have us try his. The gazpacho was very good (not cold enough for my liking) and had the power of spice at the end of it.If it had been a little colder it would have been a contender to tie for first place. However, I cannot leave this blog without a special mention to Le Jardin de Roi  FANTASTIC RIBS.  if you haven’t had them yet, RUN, do not walk, RUN to get them. They are the most unbelievable ribs I have ever eaten and I only eat ribs there. My husband quoted me saying “I could never be a vegetarian just because of these ribs.”  Trust me, my life is really all about food and if tell you something is fabulous it is. Check it out when you are in the neighborhood. Tell them Laurie sent you. You won’t be sorry, I promise.

Gazpacho Ratings

First Place:   Local

Second Place: Le Jardin De Roi

Third Place: Sussan Lawrence

Fourth Place: Deciccios

*RIBS: only at Le Jardin, I’m still licking my chops…so to speak.* MUST HAVE!

Plinky Prompt: A call from an unexpected person. Who is it, and what is the conversation about?

  • Frosted Flakes

    Frosted Flakes (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

    You receive a call from an unexpected person. Who is it, and what is the conversation about? Go! See all answers

  • The Phone Rings………
  • Hi,
    I’m sure you don’t remember me but my name is Steven and we met in an airplane many years ago flying from Boston to New York. We dated a for a while and even though our chemistry and apparently quick friendship was amazing, I was a complete jerk. I remember I had an office trip for a month after (which I’m sure you thought you would never hear from me again) but I was utterly taken with you. Maybe smitten is a better word.  I sent you postcards, several postcards if I remember. We had a quick and easy banter and a similar sense of humor, and I remember how quick you were with answers, nobody had ever come back as quickly as you and I was enthralled by your wit and by your open smile and dancing green eyes. I can still picture them. It was a tough combination for me to ignore and I knew I couldn’t do it.

    Apparently, over your vacation at home, you had just gone through an extremely difficult situation with your family. A devastating one. You never told me what happened, you couldn’t at the time, you were bleeding still and raw and I was impatient. I forgot you were young and that my track record was really not good, that was my fault, entirely. I totally messed everything up.

    I would call you to say I would be there at your house at 8pm and I would not show up until 12 midnight, this happened more than once. You should have slammed the door in my face, I DID deserve it, I almost wish you had. You probably felt the same way. I remember you told me what your best friend said about me, it hurt but it was true: “There are NO MORE excuses, not even if his family was decimated in a fire, there is always time for a ten second call.” She was right, you were right. T

    I was a selfish, rich, overachiever who thought he had to prove himself in this world. But, that’s what I loved so much about you. Remember when you said your most favorite time with me was when we ate Frosted Flakes in my living room? That was YOU in a sentence. Your grin, your sparkling green eyes, the way you threw your head back, laughing. You didn’t care if I had a BMW or any kind or car, or the prestigious job I had. All you cared about was me, the real me. You saw the unguarded moment that no one else had ever picked up on, except for you. Eating Frosted Flakes in the living room, me trying to explain football to you!! ( Sorry, I couldn’t help that one)

    I’m here now to say, I deeply regret how I treated you. I saw on Facebook that you are married with two beautiful grown-up children, and of course, a dog. I’m glad and somehow I knew you would keep your last name! I am still single but I am in the beginning of making amends. I knew I had to start with you. Even though it was just a short time, thank you for being in my life.

  • special thanks to Frosted Flakes

Plinky Prompt-3 Things You Love About Yourself

  • Tell us three things that you absolutely love about yourself. See all answers
    • Just Call Me June Cleaver
    • Leave It To Beaver 1959 This is so much harder than writing 3 things I hate about myself but here we go:!) I’m sensitive to others

      2) I’m perceptive and pick up on others feelings, body language, mood

      3) Very empathic

      All these help in being a good mom, wife and family member and friend.

    • Previous Answer
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  • None of your friends have responded yet. You were the first!

Am I Just Too Old?

Facebook logo Español: Logotipo de Facebook Fr...

Facebook logo Español: Logotipo de Facebook Français : Logo de Facebook Tiếng Việt: Logo Facebook (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

I miss the old days. Before computers and messages and Facebook. When people called each other on the telephone, you know the ones that hung from the wall in putrid yellow and green with curly, tangled cords. They conveyed news, good and bad. You were able to preface things with either hesitation if it was bad news or words that conveyed your discomfort. Good news was easy, people could tell by the lilt of your excited voice. It doesn’t happen that way anymore. I found out about a friend’s death on Facebook. FACEBOOK. It’s true, and it says a lot about society at least to old-fashioned me.

I’m not saying we were best friends and that we had lunch together every week but in the old days when I grew up there was a phone chain. At least you could get a phone call from someone who knew someone and there was that one moment of preparation when an unfamiliar voice would ask to speak to you somewhat hesitantly……You got the needling sensation in your stomach that something was just not right and even though you can never really be prepared, at least you had a gut feeling.

I got the message, as others did, in black and white print, in the form of a lovely, well-written memorial (Thank you, Roland in no way is this a criticism of YOU.)  Couldn’t someone have sent a mailing at least to soften the blow? I guess not, that’s not the way society works these day. I should catch up with the future, I’m just not sure if I can.

I’m still in shock. Truly, I can’t grasp that my friend is dead, maybe because I only had a hint that she was sick. I knew she was in pain once when I saw her but I didn’t know from what; everyone has a bad day now and then. Although I sensed something was wrong when she snapped at me once; that was so not like her at all.  It was pure intuition that made me feel something was  off, nothing else.

Reading her eulogy in print has not given me time to acclimate to the news. Her own Facebook page is still up, with her own heavenly smile lighting up her page.  I’m not sure how to deal with this, there is nothing I can do except get used to the idea she is gone. Having no information makes it worse.

I’ve said good-bye to Helen in my heart and I know that’s all I can do. But finding out about someone’s death on Facebook? That’s got to be a new low. At least for me.

I Will Cross My Fingers For You

Fingers Crossed

Fingers Crossed (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Hi new person,

I just met you for a second on Facebook before, I don’t know you but I saw your name. All I know is that we were brought together by someone we know in common, a gentle, spiritual medium named Roland Comtois. You asked him for healing energy for your doctor’s appointment tomorrow but I think he had signed off by then. I offered to send healing energy to you and asked for others to join in. I don’t know you but any decent person would understand your anxiety and fear.

You are having a check up for your yearly mammogram, having been diagnosed with breast cancer before. Of course you are nervous and scared. Who wouldn’t be? I will give you advice that my Dad, when he was alive, gave me: Stay in Neutral. If you make a conscious effort it helps. You can avoid all the “what if….scenarios.”

I will send you magic dust so you can sleep tonight and get some rest and tomorrow I will pray that your examination goes well. I don’t even remember your first name now but I’m sure my healing energy and prayers will find the right person. I would do this in a second for anyone who needed it or wanted it. Family and friends of course, but just hearing in my mind, the tone of your message was enough for me to volunteer.

I hope all goes well but even if it doesn’t, you will have the strength to deal with it and carry on. Why? Because there is no other choice. We all fight to be alive, it’s an instinct. I think you will be fine, I praying for that. Good luck tomorrow my unknown friend.

My thoughts will be with you all day.

Good Luck!

Laurie

Plinky Prompt: What Is Your Wasteful HABIT? (Light’s On? Paper Towels?)

Pin Curls & Marcel Waves

Pin Curls & Marcel Waves (Photo credit: Lea Ann Belter Bridal)

  • Wasteful Is Such A Harsh Term…….
  • Who Is The Judge Here?
    Lights on? Use of lots of paper towels? Please. Nothing as simple as those examples. My biggest, guiltiest pleasure which people could call a wasteful habit is my GREATEST delight……..PINTREST. I love it. It’s an on-line collage maker for lack of better terms. (NO, I don’t work there-I wish) I can spend hours on-line mixing and matching photos to my “boards.” It’s a dream come true from a person who used to love making collages–without the messy glue, torn pages from magazines and oak tag. I used to think Facebook was a wasteful habit, now I know it is. I spend much less time on Facebook than I used too. Pintrest (though I still pronounce it PIN-INTEREST in my mind) is like art. It’s my before-bed, relaxation routine. No need for soft music or deep breathing, yoga, meditation or a glass of wine. Grab your computer and start pinning. It’s magical. Dare tell me it’s not…….
    p.s. I’m quite horrified that Plinky doesn’t even have a photo of it from Flickr. Gasp!
  • photo NOT from PINTREST

Christmas Angels

English: Christmas angel in modern glass desig...

Dear Santa,

We have no money in our family to give each other presents this year but I am not complaining about that at all. We are back home and that is the biggest gift we could have been given. We are giving each child something small for Christmas but it’s not like years past when there were a pile of gifts to buy and arrange on top of a big table. The children are much older but we all LOVE presents. My husband and I are not exchanging presents this year. The whole rebuilding of our house took extra money we had and while we did get a home equity loan, we are trying to pare down any added expenses.

Yesterday afternoon there was a huge box on our substitute kitchen table, four television tables pressed together. I looked at it curiously and assumed it was insurance papers or even worse, tax forms.

I was amazed that my name was on it; I couldn’t imagine what it might be or from whom. I gasped when I looked at the return name and address. It was from a friend who I deemed “my little sis” on Facebook. What was she doing? I knew her own struggles with money and expenses, why would she send ME something? Inside the treasured box were all sorts of lovely things, each bought, you could tell, with love and friendship. Each gift had a special meaning to both of us.

I didn’t even have enough money to do the Santa Swap that our chronic pain group (Graceful Agony) participated in, nor the wherewithal to make something simple for friends; we are still unpacking from the hotel room we had to stay in for three and a half months while our house was being rebuilt. Opening my surprise gift was the high point of my day.

My Facebook friend took the time to go shopping when she was in pain and cared about me enough to send me a package when I know she is hurting both physically and financially as well. She’s more than a friend, she’s my Christmas Angel.

I even had the gift of hearing her voice when I immediately called to say “Thank you.” We struggle alone and together with our chronic pain, having someone who knows how it feels is a blessing in itself. I want my friend to get better, she has more serious problems that I have, her pain is more severe and more consistent.

My Christmas wish is that she finds a wonderful caring surgeon that will help her and fix the mistakes that another doctor in the past, made. Please give her the hope and the chance leading a normal life with less pain. She doesn’t ask for much and she gives so much to others. Santa, I know you have delivered most of your gifts already but please swing by her house or send a messenger anytime in the New Year and let her know she has not been forgotten by you. That, is my Christmas prayer.

DEDICATED TO TAMMY S.