Dear Celine,
I just read that you are pregnant with twins and that is making me extraordinarily happy. I am grinning and know exactly how you feel. Anyone who has gone through infertility is probably reacting the same way with universal delight. Having a baby, for many people is a long and rough road, not to mention painful, expensive and emotionally draining. I should know, it took two and a half years to become pregnant with our first child.
When I was going through the infertility process 20 years ago, nobody talked about it. The only people you talked to about this gut-wrenching secret with were the other women you met in the infertility clinic and your husband. Having children had always, always been my dream for life; not having them felt inconceivable (no pun intended). Years ago, I felt humiliated and embarrassed, depressed and without hope. That’s not a good feeling every day, every month for over two and a half years; I remember it being one of the most depressing parts of my life because it felt like the death of hope. I got pregnant with my son two and a half years after we started trying, with help. Then, like thrilling magic, without infertility treatments, I got pregnant with our daughter, twelve months after our son was born. It is a feeling no one understands until you have been through it. Believe me.
Today, it is not the shameful secret that it was 20 years ago. It wasn’t discussed on television or written about in magazines. It was whispered with hushed silences and every day there were reminders of what we did not have. Everywhere I looked there were glowing pregnant women and adorable infants, baby carriages and pregnancy news 24/7. It’s like when you first need prescription glasses and suddenly realize how many people wear glasses.
At least now, there are support groups and people to lean on that understand the experience. When something is kept a deep, dark secret, you feel you are all alone. Congratulations, dear Celine. I am rooting for you and your precious family. I understand how it feels to go through the infertility process. You are 14 weeks pregnant, may you have a safe and healthy pregnancy. We all love happy news ; you bring us joy, you give us hope. We wish the same for you and your family.
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