Fibromyalgia And Flunking The Sobriety Test

Sunset Police Car

Sunset Police Car (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Calm down, it’s not what you think. I can’t handle alcohol on ANY level, never could. Way back in my college days my friends would order a pitcher of beer and a Coke for me.  My now 20-year-old son’s advice is that I didn’t try hard enough. I should have just kept drinking because “it gets better.”  I’m sorry. I’m apparently a disappointment to my daughter and husband too.

One would think with my distaste for alcohol I would potentially have NO trouble with the law. That might not be the case. I went to my doctor, months ago, because I had consistent tingling in my legs and my internist (of course) referred me to a neurologist. The appointment was made and I forgot about it while my husband and I vacationed in Rhode Island for a few days. We had bright, sunny skies, we dug our toes into the silky sand, and ate raspberry scones, home-made sticky baked french toast for breakfast every day with a bowl of fresh blueberries and inexpensive lobster rolls at night. We napped daily.

One day I remember walking towards our car to my husband and then……. I was down……. I was on the floor, lying down, face down and have no idea what happened. Did I black out? Maybe. My knees and legs were bloody and filled with gravel but luckily my face was in good shape, apparently at the last-minute my husband said my arm came up instinctively to save my face. I hadn’t slipped on anything, there were no stones to tumble on, there was no logical reason this happened. I hadn’t twisted my ankle or sprained any ligament. I just went down. I wasn’t happy. Nobody was happy.

Upon my return I was even more nervous about seeing the neurologist who had ordered a plethora of tests including a CAT scan. My brain was perfect, the tests were perfect. Except for one. I could not, literally could NOT, walk a straight line. He told me I flunked that one outright and he had no idea why. He also felt there was no need to pursue it after seeing my brain scan. It’s true that a symptom of Fibromyalgia is imbalance but drunken-looking imbalance? Let’s say I was tired and driving sloppily, imagine a police car pulling me over and asking me to walk a straight line, maybe they would even give me a do-over since my breathalyzer test was normal…. I swear I’d be in the slammer pretty darn fast. Hopefully, you can still make one phone call. Even better, do you think I should get a doctor’s note?

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The Cops Caught Me

Sunset Police Car

Image via Wikipedia

Oh THAT SIlly Thing……..

It was an honest mistake. No really, I swear. I was in the center of town in MA. running to the post office to pick up a mountain of resumes for a freelance assignment I had accepted. The whole project had problems and I knew from my one meeting with the head of the company, this project didn’t sound necessary. I told them what I thought and still they insisted. I knew deep inside that they did not need anyone else and I told them that an in-house person would do, but they wouldn’t listen. I worked hard, really hard but one morning, parked outside of the post office I realized that I inadvertently left my keys in the car only to discover it was locked. Locked solid.

A police officer was near-by and I told them what I had done. I was incredibly mad at myself and felt like an utter fool. My husband and I had two very young children at the time so I did not want to bother him if I didn’t have to. The police officer was nice enough to offer me a ride home in the police car to pick up the second set of keys. I called my husband immediately and told him to bring our son, age 3, outside. He was a huge fan of police cars, firetrucks, and ambulances and I wanted him to see the police car. I felt pretty stupid locking myself out of the car and I don’t really know what the neighbors thought but to my son, I was a rock star and there was NO feeling better than that.

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