I Would Be OverJoyed If ….

1. I NEVER had to hear about Anthony Weiner or his “wiener/weiner” again.

, member of the United States House of Represe...

, member of the United States House of Representatives. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

2.  I never saw any of the Kardashians/siblings/spouses/children ever. I’m sorry, I must have missed something. Why exactly is this family famous? They did WHAT? Related to #1? That just can’t be right. And the first husband is not the father of whom? And the mother has a talk show, why? However, I do want the nice sister to get pregnant if indeed she wants to get pregnant. Whatever.

3. a) ( I was going to write about Honey BooBoo but she is a child, so I’m not as tempting as it might be.)

b)   The government would pass an anti-papparazi bill so that celebrities/government officials would not have to WORRY about people chasing their children and hiding in bushes for a good shot. Car chasing is WRONG. Come on, this is easy, just do it. All those who have stood up to the paparazzi for their children Right you are!! Yes, you are famous but your child is not (unless you make him or her famous) cough, like some actors and actresses have done. Your bad.

4. The makers of Nutella would have never come to America because my family and I addicts  big time. KIDDING. (We ❤ you Nutella) We are so glad you came to America from Europe in 1983, We are thoroughly addicted, thank you and all we need is a spoon or our greedy fingers.

5.People/Relatives/Fans would let Paris Jackson have some more time to grieve and keep her away from the public eye and too much emotional upheaval. Give this young woman some supervised space with someone she can thoroughly trust. Oprah, Gayle.Rosie?  Any of you in?

6. Lindsay Lohan doesn’t end up dead because from all the signs it sure looks like she is heading that way. It is NOT a joke.

7. One teenager, one kid, would take Glee’s Cory Monteith (or anyone else’s overdose) SERIOUSLY and decide NOT to do drugs. I FRIGGIN MEAN IT.

8. Families could eat dinner together, every night not just once a week and  I know that is really hard. Please TRY to have some quality time, all together, it’s important. Let the kids have a snack, maybe Mom or Dad could come home early twice a week? Negotiate.

9. If the FDA would NOT approve something until it has been thoroughly tested. Tested. Except drugs for any terminal illness. be flexible there.

10.a) I saw a commercial that said “this commercial has been approved by the Hillary Clinton Presidential Campaign of 20116.”

10.b) I had the technology skills to make a large red X across #1’s smug, arrogant face.

Thanks for reading.

Photo property of the photographer, not mine. Trust me.

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Why Lindsey Lohan Isn’t In Jail NOW….

My files (found the original; it's not much be...

Image via Wikipedia

This mugshot is found from http://www.perezhil...

Image via Wikipedia

The explanation? Double standards.

I should not even be wasting my time to post another article about Lindsey Lohan, but, I can’t help myself. She has such a sense of ENTITLEMENT and no wonder, everyone seems to handle her with kid gloves. Judge? Lawyers? LA County? I’m sorry, (heavy sarcasm) she missed the first day of her volunteer commitment in the morgue. Oh, she was just late , well of course, let’s give her another chance. NO. They should have thrown her Versace backside into the slammer right then and there. Done. Over. No more chances.

Give us, the real population, a break. She is a washed-up child star who is begging for attention by her behavior. Fail a drug test? Maybe she ate a bagel with poppy seeds by mistake. Oops. If you or I, or any member of the general public had failed probation once we would be in deep doody. Lindsey? Nah, let’s give her one more chance….and another one…why? Because she is/was a celebrity.

If she wasn’t a “celebrity” would she have gotten all these second, third, twenty chances? NO, if a regular person, with a real job had screwed up this many times, they would have been in lock down years ago. Did you know she ordered cupcakes and burgers to the staff and volunteers at the morgue as an apology for being late yesterday? Yes she did and OH NO SHE DIDN’T! Apparently the cupcakes were not accepted (not sure about the burgers.)

Does this not show everyone (hello Judge?) that she still doesn’t get it?

With all the times she failed probation, drank when she shouldn’t have, failed sobriety tests. California? What?  You didn’t learn from the OJ Simpson trial?  Apparently not. It seems like all you have to be in California, is a celebrity, preferably a rich one.

Let her keep on getting away with things, and then start planning her funeral.

An Open Letter To Lindsay Lohan

My files (found the original; it's not much be...

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Dear Lindsay,

I am not a reporter or a tabloid hunter, I don’t have anything to do with Hollywood or acting, modeling or AA. The only thing I over indulge with are oatmeal raisin cookies, and the occasional (not THAT occasional) Almond Joy bar or half a piece of baklava. It won’t end me up in rehab or the Betty Ford Clinic but it does make my clothing too tight and uncomfortable. I wouldn’t be able to be a plus-sized model, I’d need to probably go up to a double plus.

That said, I can deal with emotional eating and extra pounds; I’m not twenty anymore so even though it doesn’t make me happy, I deal with it. I’m sure women in their 50’s can relate to me. I’m a parent of two teenagers, a boy 19 and a girl 17. I’m not a saint and either are they but we cope as best we can. My son has done things I don’t approve of, I’m sure my daughter will do the same. Thus ends the comparison. We’ve instilled good values in them, they are bound to make mistakes, but we will be here, always, to help them get it right with every ounce of our being and love.

You were a sweet, adorable kid. Don’t believe me? Watch The Parent Trap again. You got turned around. Turned around again and again and so fast that you seemed not to have a childhood or an adolescence or two strict parents on the same page. You have made mistakes, tried (feebly, in my own opinion) to correct them and failed, tried and failed again and again. Listen up, there’s hope, you are not Amy Winehouse. Yet.

I’m not being mean or cruel or trying to blame. I am begging you to wake up, leave your friends that party with you and move on, and most importantly, move AWAY.  Don’t care about Hollywood or movies for the time being or modeling. Just think about being clean, and whole, loved and TRUSTED. Turn your life around while you can. Don’t lose this chance. Please.

I’m not your mom, I’m not even a fan but I implore you to think about what you have been through and where you are going. You must know a lot of rich, DOWN TO EARTH celebrities that don’t live in Hollywood or NYC anymore. Reach out to them. Better yet, is there anyone that can help Lindsay, actors, philanthropists, solid, strict, good people-who don’t drink or use drugs and that have real values and appreciate life? Reach out to Lindsay, please. How about Rosie O’Donnell or Ellen Degeneres? The seem like sweethearts to me. If you know them CALL them or knowing them, RETURN their calls. I know, to my dismay, that Oprah is in a different place than she was once but I bet if you called her for help, she WOULD help you.

You are invited here, to our tiny house, but it would not be what you are used to. Maybe that’s a good thing. My husband may kill me but you can stay with us, upstairs right next to our bedroom in a tiny spare room. I wouldn’t rat you out to the press or to anyone. I would help you learn to trust again. There are people out there that you can rely on, you need to find them. Stick with them and they will stick with you.

Please don’t be the next Amy Winehouse, there is no need for that. You have a chance while so many terminally ill people DON’T. You have a choice. Now, get honest and get real, dye your hair, change your name and come over.

P.S. you would not be exempt from loading the dishes into the dishwasher or any other household family chore.

P.S.S.  My husband said it was fine.

From A Concerned Parent


Pop Cop: Lindsey Lohan (Get A Grip)

This mugshot is found from http://www.perezhil...

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I read today that the quintessential Lindsey Lohan is headed back to rehab for violating the terms of her probation. Really. If it were up to me I would  boot her skinny white ass to jail where, I think, she belongs. Forgive me for being crass but let’s take the rich, glamorous, Hollywood glitz and celebrity status out of this situation and then do the math.  Replace Lindsey Lohan’s name with an UNKNOWN drug addict from ANYWHERE:  Hawaii, Nevada, Florida, New York, a tiny crack house in Los Angeles ( you pick) and then hand down your verdict. Remove the expensive lawyers, the media frenzy and the public’s fascination for Hollywood and where does that leave you? Probably in jail, with the rest of the people who don’t have a ton of money for rich, top-notch lawyers. If this case involved an unknown, “regular” person would they too receive the “get out of jail free” card? Not in my opinion. I don’t think they would get the same number of chances when they relapsed either.

How many “do-overs” would we get for the same exact crime?  Many people have drug and alcohol addictions and I am sure its an extremely difficult thing to go through but, in my personal opinion, it was made easier for Ms. Lohan.

I’m sick of a justice system that allows a young addict like Lindsey Lohan to go back to a rehab program instead of sharing a cell in the county jail (oh right, I forgot, she had her own private cell when she was in jail.)  Where is her orange jumpsuit now? What privileges have been taken away from her? They even removed the SCRAM bracelet that detects drugs and alcohol from her fragile, famed, skinny, ankle.

What’s next for Lindsey Lohan after rehab? Perhaps a movie career, a modeling job or a talk show host for the daytime diva.  I seem to be missing the part where she is supposed to say “I am totally responsible for my actions.” I don’t know what will happen to Ms. Lohan after her stint in rehab; I have no idea, nor do I truly care. In all likelihood she will be able to work on her clothing line in rehab and will reap the financial rewards when she gets discharged.

Will Lindsey Lohan go the route of Anna Nicole Smith? It’s a possibility, I’m sure. It’s in her best interest to finally get herself clean, I’m just not sure if she can stay clean and sober. For her sake, I hope she does. She has brought this upon herself, partying to all hours of the night with her friends; touting liquor like it was her favorite lipstick. Get clean Lindsey, you’ve been given yet another chance. Don’t mess it up.


Mel Gibson, I’ve Always *STRONGLY DISLIKED You

In my first draft of this post, the title was:” Mel Gibson I’ ve always *hated you.”Dislike just seemed way too much of an understatement. After reading and posting that draft, I realized I was being hypocritical by using the word “hate,” since then I wouldn’t be much better ( ok, that’s debatable) than Mel Gibson himself.  However, there is not a single, solitary thing I like about Mel Gibson, including his acting, his movies, his racist and anti-semitic rants and his abuse towards women. I’m not even saying alleged abuse since apparently he admitted this on tape.

I have no patience for fools, and certainly no patience for those who speak out with hatred and evil. I am not representing one race or one religion here, I represent them all. Mel Gibson, you make me sick. While I have never paid a dime to see any of your work you can rest assured I will NEVER pay a cent now. For people to pay good money to watch depravity and evil is a sin.

Don’t start with the 5th amendment either. I don’t care. I don’t like you, I don’t respect you and I don’t care if you are addicted to alcohol. Just don’t, please don’t, end up in “rehab” and say it wasn’t your fault. I’m sick of it. I was sick of it with Tiger Woods and I am sick of it here too. Don’t even get me started on Lindsay Lohan….

I actually happened to see a few minutes of the show “The View” where they were talking about Mel Gibson. Whoopi Goldberg, a woman and actress I deeply admire, was telling the co-presenters and the audience that “Mel Gibson was a friend, and she had never seen him act like this in front of her.” While I admire her allegiance to her friend, I question what she was thinking and what point she was trying to make. Yes, alcohol does make you do stupid and bad things but it doesn’t mean, just because he hasn’t acted that way in your presence, it hasn’t happened. I think we all know better.

Put me on “The View” I’m just in the mood to battle with Elizabeth Hasselback and high-five Joy Behar. As for Whoppi Goldberg? You are entitled to your feelings and your truth. But, while you defend your friend, try to make sure, to keep an open mind. See how he interacts with his other friends, girlfriend, people of different religions and races.

I’ve lost patience with all these so-called movie stars or celebrities. How about us admiring a person because they are good, because they are nice, and give plenty to charity? How about we make no exceptions for movie stars and celebrities because they are “famous.”  Famous for what?