Mellow Yellow Monday – Corn on the Cob

It’s bitter cold outside, I’m dreaming about warm weather and backyard bbq’s.

The Weber grill has some sweet and savory chicken,  hamburgers and hot dogs too. Family and friends sit around having a soda or a beer, fresh lemonade. There’s potato salad, coleslaw and delicious sweet and crunchy, corn on the cob and home-made buttery bread. It’s like a bit of sunshine sweetness in every bite. Chips and dip, nothing fancy, just great food and perfect weather, hanging outside for as long as we want, with a guitar strumming and people singing out back in the garden.

I miss summer so badly, I could just about cry.

The following is the author's description of t...

The following is the author’s description of the photograph quoted directly from the photograph’s Flickr page. “One a day food item 20 ” (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Plinky Prompt: What Makes You Feel Better When You Are In A Bad Mood?

  • When you’re in a bad mood, who or what makes you feel better? See all answers
  • Mood Enhancer
  • Let Me Just Clear My Throat……
    singing along When I am in a bad mood, I can rely on music to make me feel better. It’s my go-to, readily accessible relief. It’s hard to stay in a bad mood if you are singing loudly to a cheerful tune. (I’m not saying, by any means of the imagination, that I have a good voice) but it sounds and feels good to me. I usually play nostalgic songs (Simon and Garfunkel, The Beatles, Crosby, Stills, Nash and Young) from my past that I associate with good times, with youth, with fun, or with recent popular songs that I sing over and over again for months on end until I get tired of them. In a bad mood? Listen to some music, and sing loudly, you’ll soon forget your troubles.

Plinky Prompt: What Do You Need For A Successful Road Trip?

  • Road Trip Essentials
  • Be Serious, a successful road trip? With ME??!!
    Day 233: Nauseous Can the first item for a successful road trip be an airplane? Thought not. It doesn’t hurt to try. Oh dear, road trip….sends shivers up and down my spine. I HATE sitting in cars for a long time because a) I have a chronic pain issue that makes it very difficult for me to sit in one place for more than an hour or two at a time and b) I have the attention span and patience of a dying tick. I get restless and want to be there and hate sitting in a car. I become one of those annoying children that say in a whiny voice:”are we THERE yet?” Trust me, you wouldn’t WANT me on a road trip although I did quite well when we were on a long road trip in Australia. However, from NYC to Washington, DC? Not so much. It took FOREVER. I find the train much more comfortable albeit more expensive.
    I need food and lots of it, snacks, Yoo-Hoo, bottles of water, plenty of places to stop so I can pee and stretch, Twizzlers (original flavor only) maybe some music. I can’t read or write because I get nauseous. I can’t sit in the back because I throw-up. Trust me, you don’t WANT me to go on a road trip with you. Besides, isn’t “successful” and “road trip” an OXYMORON??? Think about it. p.s. My poor family would have to be looking at this type of expression the entire, repeat, the entire time we are on the road.

Mellow Yellow Monday – Taylor Swift

Country pop singer Taylor Swift performs on th...

Image via Wikipedia

Yellow is my favorite color, it makes me smile. It comes in so many forms, daffodils, “duckies”, sunshine, warmth. However, even if I don’t know all of  this weeks contender for Mellow Yellow Monday’s music very well, how can I not choose Taylor Swift, golden girl in her yellow dress?  She’s perfect and lovely, and I will now listen to her music too.

Join me in giving a round of applause to Taylor Swift, my Mellow Yellow Monday award finalist!

I Wish I Had Twizzlers Right Now

A pack of Twizzlers

Image via Wikipedia

Random things about me:

I love deleting my SPAM folder. I don’t just like it, I look forward to it. Now its at zero, YES!!

When I eat a piece of dark chocolate I feel virtuous. Let’s face it, milk is my chocolate of choice, it’s sweet, it’s sensual but dark is healthy and I’m aiming to please. Health points, two for me.

Haven’t had red meat in three months. When hubby starts grilling those famous burgers of his outside, I know I won’t be able to resist. I can deal with that: moderation.

I am proud to say that I both Love and Like my son and my daughter and I’m Proud of them both. This is an amazing feeling. It gives my life purpose and meaning. They have turned into wonderful young adults, 17 and 19. Goal: Achieved.

It takes my ten-year old dog more time to jump on and off the bed. I have noticed a difference in the last year and it breaks my heart. You can never be ready but I am starting to prepare myself. Preparation: Grief. I need to do this. I love her THAT much.

Starting to explore the Internet for new recipes  to try. Good for me.

Bought a juicer, used it for a week. Hid it. Pain in the ass to clean. Need to find it (again) and man up. Love the juices, hate the cleaning. I need to get over myself. Fail.

Am reading a trash novel, it’s a nice break from all the morbid and depressing books I always read. It’s not even trashy as it is easy chick lit although rumor has it that the phrase is not politically correct anymore. Sorry, Jennifer Weiner, author.

When I wear the perfume Angel, I feel special and people compliment me on it all the time. I like that.

I dress so poorly, my daughter is a bit ashamed of me, she has a right to be. She’s taking me shopping soon, I’m more than a little afraid.

I have very bad feet. I can only wear one type of sneaker with orthotics. Other people with bad feet understand this. Fashionable girls (like my daughter) do not. That, I cannot change.

Deviled eggs, roast chicken, banana bread, pot roast, pea soup, chicken soup are things I cook/bake extremely well.

I once pooped in my pants when I had a stomach virus and couldn’t make it home on time. Mad sick.

Last night I woke up and my jaw was locked, it was terrifying. I must have been clenching my teeth so hard I could not open my mouth. Grabbed an Alleve and swallowed it, thankfully it helped.

I have a fear of germs and sickness, especially getting the dreadful Eppiglottitis again which just about killed me. Twice. Pain like searing swords in a red, hot throat. Childbirth was easy compared to it. Please don’t come back again. I carry Purell in my purse.

Sometimes I feel scared and anxious of things in advance, I try to talk myself out of it. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn’t. I hate when it happens.

I still have stuffed animals and I am proud of it. There is no age limit on stuffed animal friends.

I tell myself that “life is short” so I should “enjoy each day” but then I forget. Working on it.

The TV Executives should never have taken off the show “Brothers and Sisters.” Don’t even think about taking off “Parenthood.”

I should listen to more music.

Haiku Heights

Apple heart

Image by Mammaoca2008 via Flickr

ALONE:

The unspoken word

We are homeless in our town

An empty bird nest

****************************************************************************

FANTASY:

Dresden, blue and white

I dream of a country home

Beside a green lake

****************************************************************************

Autumn:

Soaked and cold and wet

A sniff of crisp, red apple

Seasons are changing

***************************************************************************

WEDDING:

Country music sounds

Radiate joy, a pink rose

Clap your hands with love

***************************************************************************

MEMORY:

My blonde, baby girl

Velvet, gold curls down her back

Sleeping with the moon

***************************************************************************

PFAM Blog Carnival – My Play List, Music For Many Moods

Today I listened to The Carpenters “It’s Gonna Take Some Time This Time To Get Myself In Shape” a worthy entry for what I am going through now being essentially homeless and in pain. With my husband on crutches due to a torn Achilles tendon I am pushing myself (no choice here) to do more physically. It also acknowledges the state of mind that I am in and allows me time to accept where I am and not get angry with myself or the situation (easier said than done.) When I am really angry I belt out: “Not Ready To Make Nice” by The Dixie Chicks, a classic song.

When I am feeling low and weary I listen to “Running On Empty” by Jackson Browne and Diana Ross singing “Good Morning Heartache” from the old movie “Lady Sings The Blues.” Both are filled with heartfelt emotion and there are times that only those songs will do. Trust me, I know. When I listen to these songs I know other people have felt the same way.

There is one song that pretty much fits all moods, all pain levels, all risks and makes me feel better physically and emotionally: Cat Stevens “If You Want To Sing Out…Sing Out, ( and if you want to be blue be blue….there’s a million things to do, you know that there are….. .”) I’ve seen the cult film Harold and Maude about a hundred times and this is the soundtrack for that movie. It’s a must-see but it’s VERY quirky.

There are oldies that I rely on when I feel okay, happy and content, I admit that lately these days are rare. “This Old Guitar” from John Denver plays or Neil Young’s “Harvest Moon.” I am particularly fond of “Harvest Moon.” Any Neil Young song will do in a pinch and of course there’s all CSN&Y, Carly Simon, James Taylor and Carole King tunes as well. Timeless. These songs are comforting because I know every word.

Music plays an important role in my life, not just as a chronic pain patient but as a person who has plenty of ups and downs in her life. Music should soothe, should invigorate (Bruce Springsteen.)  When I feel sad, and lonely about the death of my father I play  Evanesence “My Immortal.” When I need to cry and let my tears fall there’s always “Dance With My Father Again” by Luther Van Dross.

When I need to take a rest from frantic worry or pain, I play Anna Nalick’s “Breathe (2AM) and when I need to get centered there’s “The Prayer” by Andrea Bocelli and Celine Dion. When I feel I can’t go on, The Corrs : “Everybody Hurts” is my 911 song. Finally, when I have a wisp of  hope and happiness, I sing out loud and strong to the The Black Eyed Peas with: “I Gotta Feeling.” “Woo Hoo!

My 911 song:

Blowing Off Steam (Plinky: How Do You Blow Off Steam?)

LifeLife’s Lessons

I find walking my dog as one great way to blow off steam (and I have had a lot of steam to blow off the last few weeks!!) I’ve tried doing deep breathing but that doesn’t really help me as much as it should. Listening to music and singing out loud works well too. As lousy as I may sound, it makes me feel happier. I don’t want to spread my anger and bad mood around…..I try the best that I can but I’m certainly not perfect. My teenage daughter blames “my bad mood” on everything. Life will have to teach her how to claim and work through her own bad moods, I’ve tried my best but failed. Time and life’s lessons will teach her, of that, I have no doubt.

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Banana Milkshakes

'Cavendish' bananas are the main commercial cu...

Image via Wikipedia

I feel really poorly again today and I don’t know why. Every step hurts, every joint aches, every muscle is stiff, and I’m not hungry, which is definitely unusual. The windows had been open with fresh air coming in but I missed the comfort of the cool air conditioner and a cozy blanket and the room swaying like a slow-motion ballet. My head is pounding and I feel weak, it’s hard to move, hard to think, I feel like throwing up but can’t.

I tried Alleve for my body aches and headache but it didn’t help. I always question and try to diagnose my ailments and when I come up with no new answers, I sigh and breathe deeply and think “Fibromyalgia Flare?” Or maybe it’s the flu or too many allergens, a virus or just a few bad days. At this point I don’t care what it is or what it is called, I just know I am back in bed, with my dog near me and my mood, weary. I’m tired of being tired and achy and I want to slip into my sneakers and go places, see people. Instead, I am alone with my book but I haven’t read one single page.

I tried so hard to heal myself and I made a banana milkshake, with very ripe bananas, milk and ice and sipped it slowly to try to soothe my spirits, to hydrate myself with bright and shiny, nutritious food. It didn’t help and I am disappointed; I thought for sure that the banana milkshake cure would help me. I tried to listen to music and sing but I just couldn’t stand to listen to the music, so I stayed silent, listening only to the beating downpour of rain attacking my windows. I can’t even think of leaving my bed to help out with driving and that makes me feel both guilty and drained; my head pounds harder, my whole body feels hot and it burns like a slow-cooker, constant with a warm temperature.

Last night I felt worse than today and I tried to cure my evening with chocolate. There’s a lot to be said about half a big pack of M & M’s at the end of a very long day. I chose each pretty color to pop into my mouth and crunch. I know it is not right to treat illness and malaise with food  but once in a while, the cheerful colors of M & M’s soothe me, the endorphins kick in and I go to sleep.

Perhaps tomorrow I will feel chipper and I will wake up happy, my head and eyes clear and more energy in my body. Maybe my legs will swing over my bed and I will greet the day with enthusiasm. But if not, maybe it will happen the next day or the one after that. If I still feel the same way I will eat the rest of the pack of M & M’s, make another banana milkshake and begrudgingly call the doctor. I will have to go in to see her and she will most probably tell me “it’s viral, go back to bed and drink plenty of liquids” as if I didn’t know that already.

Music I've Been Listening To Recently

First Barbra Steisand, Now This. Unforgivable.

Paul McCartney

I’m listening to Paul McCartney and to The Beatles. I’m inflicting pain on myself by listening to Sir Paul McCartney on itunes instead of going to his concert. I am punishing myself for not getting tickets to Paul’s concert when he was in town. I could kick myself (and my husband) for not getting tickets, for not taking a chance with the weather, for not spending the money to go, for staying home and pretending it didn’t matter. What was I thinking? I don’t really know, but I know now, that it was a big mistake and I am a complete ass.” I should have known better…….”

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