The Big Swallow

Dear Dr. Batman.

Every night my mouth gets dry and I try to convince myself that it is from the allergy pill I have taken. In the morning I can barely part my lips and my whole mouth feels like it is full of cotton, as if I had been at the dentist all night getting painful injections, mouth puffed up and out, red cheeks pulsating with pain.

I swallow carefully, a few times in a row, even though there is nothing to swallow. I reach for the tall glass of clear, cold water with lemon that stands next to me on the wooden bed stand and take a few tentative sips.

Yes, my mouth is dry, check. It is a bit scratchy, check. Can I call it an official sore throat? No. Is it “The Dreaded Eppiglottitis?” Thank God, no or at least not yet. I rue the day that happens to me again, for the third time (or is it the fourth?) My fellow eppiglottitis sufferers know what I mean, they know EXACTLY what I mean; it’s not a pain that you can ever forget. When we get it, we get it BAD, there is no way of getting it any other way. It doesn’t come in light, medium or strong degrees, it only comes in “devastating and horrific.” Believe me, childbirth is nothing compared to this.

Apparently, there is a vaccine that is given to children that could prevent this from ever happening to adults again but no one will give it to us grown-ups. I’ve asked “why?” a bunch of times but apparently “it’s not used for this purpose.” There are a million things used for different purposes that help other conditions not used for the original intentions but help others with different maladies. Why no one will look into this, I HAVE NO IDEA.

Acute catarrhal pharyngitis. The oropharynx is...

I was put on methotrexate, a drug for cancer, when I didn’t have cancer. I had Fibromyalgia and my hot-shot brainiac crazy as all hell Rheumatologist prescribed it to me. It made me feel great, best drug I was on. Unfortunately, it had bad side effects so I couldn’t stay on it but boy, did it help. He thought outside the box and while I couldn’t take the drug, the man was a genius. A crazy, arrogant genius but still, a genius.

Epiglottitis is a bitch, there’s no way around that. It’s a sure-fire way to get the worst possibile pain and a speedy pass to the Emergency Room if you feel your throat swelling up and you have trouble breathing. I don’t think it’s too much to ask for SOME CREATIVE doctors to at least look into the reasons why we CAN’T have the vaccine that is given regularly to babies.

People, doctors, do not want to go out of their comfort zones, even if it is to save people an enormous amount of pain. A medical friend in England asked me why the American doctors were so hesitant to do this, I had no answer. To her, there was an illness and a cure, it made sense. It makes sense to me too. What happened to “First do no harm?” I guess that is antiquated or is now synonymous with “It’s not in my job description.”

That really stinks. Help us, someone, please.

There is only one pediatrician that I remember from when my adult children were little that I can imagine going out of his way to even think about this. He recently returned from helping sick people in Africa. He’s THAT kind of nice guy. Please, Dr. Batman from MKMG?

If anyone, I know you would try or at least think about it, It would mean so much to so many people. Please, will you just read this letter? I know you will do at least that much, I wouldn’t bother to send it to anyone else.

You’ve always been kind to everyone, moms, dads and especially children. Just take a quick look.

Thanks in advance.

Eppiglottitis Mom

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Epppiglottitis, No Cure? MY Ass

Give. Me. The. Shot. The Vaccine. I want it. I want it NOW. No, not in a few minutes, not in a month or two. I can’t wait another second. Find someone, someone with authority to approve it. I can’t beg or grovel anymore. I know the kids’ vaccination exists, I know you have it in your back pediatric room. Stick it to me. In my arm or in my behind, just do it. Trust me, I will not cry, unless the tears are of relief.

The only pediatrician I know to have a kind and open heart is Dr. Batman, he thinks outside the box, he cares. No, he was not my children’s pediatrician at the big Medical Group not far from NYC but that’s okay. We called him Batman when my children were little, he had all kinds of Batman gear and toys in his office, every time he saw us he smiled. Even when my daughter, wearing her sweet pink dress, white tights and black shiny shoes kicked him in his shin, he was nice. I was mortified.

It was one of those horrific mother moments. I wanted to move to another country or enroll my daughter in juvenile hall but I made her write an apology note at home and more importantly I marched her back in and made her give it to him. Lesson learned.

After my first essay called “CALLING EPPIGLOTTITIS IS A BITCH IS A VAST UNDERSTATEMENT” (EARLIER ON THIS BLOG)

A reader wrote to me recently and said:” Lastly, since many posters seem to be getting this horrible illness more than once, go get vaccinated! Vaccinations started somewhere between 1988 and 1990. Prior to that time, most cases of epiglottitis were pediatric, but now it is more often found in adults (albeit still rare) who were born before vaccinations started.”

I’m starting a revolution, a Vaccinate Eppiglottitis revoution.  WHY can’t we have it. “Because” is NOT an answer. “Because it’s just for kids does NOT HELP.

English: Acute epiglottitis; Lateral view in X...

English: Acute epiglottitis; Lateral view in X-ray imaging (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Spell it out. Why are you torturing so many thousands of people every day and leaving them at risk of dying? Of their throats swelling up, unable to breathe, causing them the worst pain that they have ever had? Trust me, giving birth was like a walk in the park compared to this.

I wouldn’t wish this on my worst enemy, well, maybe one or two.

We deserve an answer. All of us who have had Eppiglottitis deserve an answer and “no” and “Cuz” is not acceptable anymore. Why can’t we use the children’s vaccination in some way to help us adults that are suffering, many times over, with this life threatening illness?

Please find out we need to know, doctors and hospitals and The American Medical Association needs to know. We deserve an answer. It’s our right. Plus, we are begging and we are at your mercy. Ok?