PFAM Blog Carnival – My Play List, Music For Many Moods

Today I listened to The Carpenters “It’s Gonna Take Some Time This Time To Get Myself In Shape” a worthy entry for what I am going through now being essentially homeless and in pain. With my husband on crutches due to a torn Achilles tendon I am pushing myself (no choice here) to do more physically. It also acknowledges the state of mind that I am in and allows me time to accept where I am and not get angry with myself or the situation (easier said than done.) When I am really angry I belt out: “Not Ready To Make Nice” by The Dixie Chicks, a classic song.

When I am feeling low and weary I listen to “Running On Empty” by Jackson Browne and Diana Ross singing “Good Morning Heartache” from the old movie “Lady Sings The Blues.” Both are filled with heartfelt emotion and there are times that only those songs will do. Trust me, I know. When I listen to these songs I know other people have felt the same way.

There is one song that pretty much fits all moods, all pain levels, all risks and makes me feel better physically and emotionally: Cat Stevens “If You Want To Sing Out…Sing Out, ( and if you want to be blue be blue….there’s a million things to do, you know that there are….. .”) I’ve seen the cult film Harold and Maude about a hundred times and this is the soundtrack for that movie. It’s a must-see but it’s VERY quirky.

There are oldies that I rely on when I feel okay, happy and content, I admit that lately these days are rare. “This Old Guitar” from John Denver plays or Neil Young’s “Harvest Moon.” I am particularly fond of “Harvest Moon.” Any Neil Young song will do in a pinch and of course there’s all CSN&Y, Carly Simon, James Taylor and Carole King tunes as well. Timeless. These songs are comforting because I know every word.

Music plays an important role in my life, not just as a chronic pain patient but as a person who has plenty of ups and downs in her life. Music should soothe, should invigorate (Bruce Springsteen.)  When I feel sad, and lonely about the death of my father I play  Evanesence “My Immortal.” When I need to cry and let my tears fall there’s always “Dance With My Father Again” by Luther Van Dross.

When I need to take a rest from frantic worry or pain, I play Anna Nalick’s “Breathe (2AM) and when I need to get centered there’s “The Prayer” by Andrea Bocelli and Celine Dion. When I feel I can’t go on, The Corrs : “Everybody Hurts” is my 911 song. Finally, when I have a wisp of  hope and happiness, I sing out loud and strong to the The Black Eyed Peas with: “I Gotta Feeling.” “Woo Hoo!

My 911 song:

Arnold Palmer, Skinny Cows, Books, Music and Me

I never thought I had an addictive personality but now I am not so sure.  I’m not addicted to drugs or alcohol, in fact I don’t drink or do drugs at all. I hate the taste of alcohol (with the exception of a really good Mojito but I can only drink half of one). However, I realized I am addicted to certain things and all new products. I am a public relations’ pleasure, I am the ultimate consumer and if I find something new that I like, like turns to love and love to obsession immediately.

I am now in love with Arnold Palmer’s lite Iced Tea and Lemonade drink.  My son, 17, turned me on to it and I drink it constantly. Usually I go for months adoring the product then I get so sick of it that I stop completely. I refuse to believe it will happen to my new love beverage but I tend to say that about everything I have been in love with. What happens is that I cycle through an addiction, find a new one and circle back. It’s a harmless beverage addiction and it makes me happy, besides we’re supposed to drink more water!  Do I go through withdrawal symptoms when I don’t have some? No, as long as there is some in the house. If not, I get anxious, seriously anxious. Perhaps I should consider rehab or an intervention?

I also am addicted to books and unfortunately not the books in the library although I go there quite often. I once bought a Kindle (gee, thanks Oprah) because of the number of books I read but that didn’t last long. I missed holding the book in my hand, I missed the texture and the feel of the paper, the fact that I could not write my name in bold, script letters on the first page to claim it as my own. I devour every word, sometimes highlighting, turning the pages deliciously and slowly, one by one.

I am the same way with music, my computer practically plays “Recently Played” songs almost automatically. I will listen to these 25 songs over and over again for a really long time. It’s something about the comfort of the repetition and the familiarity of those favorites that make me happy. Sometimes I will get sick of them, (although it’s been a long haul for the latest batch and I’m still listening to them) and I will move on to the next….eventually.   For now “I Dreamed A Dream” sung by the Glee cast has been played at least fifty times, okay everything from the Glee cast has been played at least 50 times, followed by the Plain White T’s song “1,2,3,4.” and Crystal Bowersox and Lee Dewyze’s duet “Falling Slowly” from American Idol. When all else fails I still turn to John Denver for comfort and nostalgic memories of my youth. His song  “This Old Guitar” actually  soothes me, and so much more natural than a Valium.

The third and final fave for this month are Skinny Cows Vanilla with Caramel swirl ice cream cones. Oh, the sticky sweetness of the caramel swirl and the soothing vanilla ice cream (ice milk?) too. You get the crunch of a “real” ice cream cone with fewer calories. The best to come is that silky smoothness of chocolate that comes at the very end of the cone and it’s unbelievably dreamy. Simple pleasures for hard times.

When things are going badly, like for the past eleven months or so (unemployment, health) I have to force myself, like now, to focus on the good, the tried and true, the familiar instead of being overwhelmed with self-pity, (I admit I held a pity party today). Today there was a lot of “Everybody Hurts” sung by The Corrs’. I will be over myself by tomorrow, I promise.   I need to take deep breaths and walk in the sun, with my dog at my side, instead of sitting inside with my trustworthy laptop, playing music I’ve heard a hundred times already.

*I am not a spokesperson for the aforementioned products, I wish.