Mel Gibson, I’ve Always *STRONGLY DISLIKED You

In my first draft of this post, the title was:” Mel Gibson I’ ve always *hated you.”Dislike just seemed way too much of an understatement. After reading and posting that draft, I realized I was being hypocritical by using the word “hate,” since then I wouldn’t be much better ( ok, that’s debatable) than Mel Gibson himself.  However, there is not a single, solitary thing I like about Mel Gibson, including his acting, his movies, his racist and anti-semitic rants and his abuse towards women. I’m not even saying alleged abuse since apparently he admitted this on tape.

I have no patience for fools, and certainly no patience for those who speak out with hatred and evil. I am not representing one race or one religion here, I represent them all. Mel Gibson, you make me sick. While I have never paid a dime to see any of your work you can rest assured I will NEVER pay a cent now. For people to pay good money to watch depravity and evil is a sin.

Don’t start with the 5th amendment either. I don’t care. I don’t like you, I don’t respect you and I don’t care if you are addicted to alcohol. Just don’t, please don’t, end up in “rehab” and say it wasn’t your fault. I’m sick of it. I was sick of it with Tiger Woods and I am sick of it here too. Don’t even get me started on Lindsay Lohan….

I actually happened to see a few minutes of the show “The View” where they were talking about Mel Gibson. Whoopi Goldberg, a woman and actress I deeply admire, was telling the co-presenters and the audience that “Mel Gibson was a friend, and she had never seen him act like this in front of her.” While I admire her allegiance to her friend, I question what she was thinking and what point she was trying to make. Yes, alcohol does make you do stupid and bad things but it doesn’t mean, just because he hasn’t acted that way in your presence, it hasn’t happened. I think we all know better.

Put me on “The View” I’m just in the mood to battle with Elizabeth Hasselback and high-five Joy Behar. As for Whoppi Goldberg? You are entitled to your feelings and your truth. But, while you defend your friend, try to make sure, to keep an open mind. See how he interacts with his other friends, girlfriend, people of different religions and races.

I’ve lost patience with all these so-called movie stars or celebrities. How about us admiring a person because they are good, because they are nice, and give plenty to charity? How about we make no exceptions for movie stars and celebrities because they are “famous.”  Famous for what?

Pop Cop: Tiger Woods, Rehab. Really ?

I thought I could do it; I thought I could ignore the whole Tiger Woods story and not blog about it. I didn’t want to add to all the misguided attention this jerk was getting, but I just couldn’t do it.  I didn’t write until now but the blog welled up inside me, finally exploded and practically wrote itself. You would think I’d be a better person than this and could let things slide, turn the other cheek, forgive and forget, but obviously I can’t and I deeply apologize for that.

Oh, Tiger, WE THOUGHT WE KNEW YE. We knew bupkes, nothing, nada. We heard, and I swear I am NOT using the word allegedly this time, that you (hmm, time to think about nicer words to use than what I am thinking) umm, copulated your way through the United States and all International time zones constantly and for many years.  People marveled at your golfing skills and I am not here to criticize your fabulous putts, shots and driving ranges. But, when you are putting and driving your shots into ranges other than your wife’s?  I have something to say.

I think I could forgive an affair, people make mistakes;  even a one night stand  (I am TRYING to be open-minded) but what you did was purely and utterly disgusting, truly you are an old fashioned pig.  Fame. Using your money, power and status for your own selfish greed, hurting loved ones.   I don’t see the beautiful Oprah doing that or Ellen Degeneres (my new heroine).  Apparently, when celebrities abuse substances, spouses and sex,  they have an addiction problem.   Excuse my language but “addiction, my ass.” Does anyone remember the word, Cheater? Philanderer? Scumbag?  It is not a new concept but apparently it is only used for “regular” people and not “so-called-stars.”Big money and cocky star status will buy you that excuse called “addiction.”   You think you are entitled because of your celebrity status, but really,  you are not.  The women you “played with” were in it willingly, I know. But, just like there are rules in a golf game, there are rules in marriage. You fail.

I love sweet things, soft sugar cookies with green sprinkles on top, a glazed raspberry jelly doughnut, rich milk chocolate, honey-laden baklava,  maple creme cookies…  This does not, however, give me the excuse to rob various bakeries and when caught, say via a PR person “I  have a sugar addiction.” Actually, I really have to try to NOT be a sugar addict or a food addict, it isn’t easy, believe me. If  I eat one jelly doughnut one night, I give it UP the next night and I try as hard as I can. Tiger Woods didn’t try, he got caught, he had celebrity status and big money; he morphed into a sex addict.  How convenient!

You made mistakes; a boat load,  a cruise ship line full of mistakes.  You still want your stardom, celebrity status, forgiveness  and your wife and children too. So far Elin Wood has been the first woman, and I thank her deeply, not to stand by her man, at least not in the beginning. She made a statement and I applaud her.  If she forgives you and you promise to be a good boy, if I were her I would still require you to have a chip implanted in your “VEPEEPEE” to keep track of you. Seriously.

Children are important!  Kids need a family and I, for one, am all for protecting the children and the family.  Work it out if you can. But don’t ever think that people will think of you the same way, they won’t. Maybe you will be a star again, a golf star,  people can be very forgiving. This time, however, another mistake will not get you the recovering sex addict get- out- of- jail- card.  Redeem yourself if you can and to put it in easily understandable albeit crude terms:  keep it zipped, no matter what.

Who We Really Are

Can you really separate the person from their actions? Should we judge a person by what they do and not who they are? Do actions define who we are?  Can you not delineate the different sides of one person. For example: (not Tiger Woods….YET)  What about Michael Jackson?  People were trying to  categorize him in one of two ways, a brilliant performer or a perverted weirdo. What was he? In my opinion, he was both.  He was an amazingly skilled artist, an incredible dancer, singer, song-writer and he made a huge contribution to the  music world as a performer and to the world of Pop.  On the other hand, we was accused several times of pedophilia, dangled his baby outside of a window for fun, lived with a chimp, had boys sleep over and share his bed and lived in Neverland. Who was he? He was both.

Bill Clinton, in my opinion, was an absolutely wonderful President and leader. He was unbelievably smart, (still is) a fabulous presence, a great contributor to our nation and a wonderful negotiator. On the other hand, he was also charming to a fault sic Monica Lewinsky, lied during office, and raised philandering to practically an art form. I have run into President Clinton a few times and just a look or a smile or  a one word greeting, personally, made me melt. The guy has the most charisma of any person I have ever met. Face it. He does. When my son made me drive around the supermarket parking lot so he could say Hi to the President, the President was as gracious to my son, kind and personable, and treated my son with warmth and sincerity as if he had been at his birth and every birthday party thereafter. Bill Clinton makes every one he talks to feel special. It works.

And of course, Tiger Woods. An amazing athlete, a role-model,  a “family guy” the world thought he had it all. He did, and more. Now all people are talking about are his torrid love/sex affairs with a plethora of women. His image has been shattered as the guy everyone looked up to came speeding down, down, and down. But, should it have been? Is it his fault, or is it ours?s

Maybe our standards are too high. Maybe we shouldn’t blend athletes, political officials, and “the rich and famous” with their personal lives. Maybe we should? I,like everyone else, question these things every day. And, are the “celebrities” entitled to their home life or does public knowledge come with the territory of their fame?

I know one thing,  people are not one sided.  We all have multiple sides to us, we are not one dimensional. The public thrives on the failings of their “heroes.”  But why? None of us is just one thing. No one is just made up of one emotion, one habit, one skill; It’s an ongoing struggle.  The truth of the matter is that we are all flawed, all imperfect and all of us have sides of us that we don’t think are particularly attractive.  We all have our good points and our bad.  Do I judge Susan Boyle on her voice? Of course. She is an incredibly gifted woman with the voice of an angel.  Do I care that she comes across as a bit unstable? Not at all. But, she doesn’t have to pick one over the other. She may be both and a whole lot more.

I think it’s okay to question, it’s ok to struggle with answers but not necessarily okay to judge. What we all have in common, us mortal human beings is that every one of us is not just one thing. We are many things, good, evil, smart and stupid. I think I am a good mom but I am lousy with bowling (ok, with all sports) does that make me less of a mother? No, it makes me a good mother with no athletic abilities whatsoever.  So, who are we to judge?  We have all made mistakes, we have all floundered and questioned and contradicted ourselves. We are loving and good and king and we are also critical, judgmental and sometimes, evil. What it comes down to really, is that all we really are is human.